NARCISSIST.
carolyn
21
15 may
opal_amber32@hotmail.com
chapman university singapore.

YAKKATY YAK.




CHUMS.
aini
berenice
charlene
doreen
gengqin
geraldine
huimei
huixin
jessica
kaibeng
kelda
kimberly
kym
michelle
nazeeya
nicole
osborne
sarah
seowling
susanna
tishone

BON VOYAGE.
01/2005
02/2005
03/2005
04/2005
05/2005
06/2005
07/2005
08/2005
09/2005
10/2005
11/2005
12/2005
01/2006
02/2006
03/2006
04/2006
05/2006
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07/2006
08/2006
09/2006
10/2006
11/2006
12/2006
01/2007
02/2007
03/2007
04/2007
05/2007
06/2007
07/2007
08/2007
09/2007
10/2007
11/2007
12/2007
01/2008
02/2008
03/2008
04/2008
05/2008
06/2008
07/2008
08/2008
09/2008
10/2008
11/2008
12/2008
01/2009
02/2009
03/2009
04/2009
05/2009
06/2009
07/2009
08/2009
09/2009
10/2009
11/2009
12/2009
01/2010
02/2010
03/2010
04/2010
05/2010
09/2010
10/2010
11/2010
02/2011

CREDITS.
pictures : one
brushes : one two
pattern: one
designer : sweet_surrender
others : blogger blogskins

awesome.
Saturday, October 31, 2009

i'm not born the intelligent type. i'm just fortunate. that's all.

oh wow. thanks for the huge ego boost mum.

oh and the reason why i didn't ask you and just donated my organs is because they are MY organs? The whole point of sending it to me is because they wanted to ask me and not you? if they wanted to ask you they would've send it a long time ago and not 20 years later? it is my body and i get to decide what happens to it after i die so yes, i donated my organs without asking and there shouldn't be a problem about it.

danced on the moon at 4:03 pm.

画沙


WOO! looking at my hubby makes me H-A-P-P-Y! =DDDDDDDDD

danced on the moon at 1:52 am.

i hate this part.
Friday, October 30, 2009

why why why why why?

why do i have feelings?

why do i even care?

maybe some day you'll understand.

fucked. this is just fucked.

i hate this part right here.

danced on the moon at 3:22 pm.

good thing comes in threes.
Thursday, October 29, 2009

hello! midterm was today! sibeh awesome. i only manage to study the night before so i had to cram the 46325427651 pages of notes into my small little brain within the night. YAY! how fun was that?! T.T there was just TOO many things to cover, i was still awake at 5am this morning. coolios! then i couldn't take it anymore and went to sleep for like 2 hours and got up at 7am to FUCKING STUDY AGAIN. FUCK THIS SHIT! RAHHHH! the best part is i had 2 papers today and i only manage to KIND OF finish studying for one. I totally had no time for the 2nd paper. weee! awesome right? so in the end i went for the 2nd paper totally unprepared! woo! most awesome is me! haha! but luckily i is a mass comm + lit student. my most powderful skill is to smoke and therefore i think i manage to smoke my way through with a tad bit of common sense. hurhurhur. YES I AM VERY PROUD OF MY SMOKING SKILLS. hehehe! one last paper coming next wed! I CAN DO THIS! woo!

the ONLY highlight of my fucking long, tiring, brain-sucking night last night was when me n kenneth went for midnight snacks at like 1 plus in the morning. HURHURHUR! we went to raid 7-11 and i had ice cream! awesome sinful i know but its naissss! =D BUT! no say me okay that crazy person bought like $9.30 worth of stuff home to pig out on. this one then is really call win. haha! literally raid the store. ha. and if you think i am crazy geeky studying like that, this person over here literally didn't sleep AT ALL. he was just mugging and mugging the whole night through. and if he didn't call me at 7, i would still be sleeping and totally missed my paper. haha! oh and can i add that HE WAS STILL MUGGING ON THE WAY TO SCHOOL ON THE BUS! like seroiusly wtf? i see i also stress lo. no wonder he's the A student. haha! he literally knew ALL the answers to the papers lo. bastard. ha.

so anyway! TODAY WAS TRAINING VENUE AOP! WOO! excited like fuck lei! hehe! i also dunno i so excited for what. also not i present. haha. but yes, to see something you worked SO hard on finally get approved, the feeling is damn song and exciting. hurhurhur! I AM SO HAPPY AND EXCITED FOR WING AND ELLANN! =DDDDD weeeee!!! so yes, i went back to office today after STUPID EXAMS to give ellann my moral support and to see our baby finally getting approved! hurhur! our months of hard work finally paid off! it's really a damn song feeling. thinking about it now makes me high again. haha! =D oh and ellann's birthday was 2 days ago and his wife just gave birth to a baby girl not long ago too! i feel so excited for him sia. hehe!

here's my fav boss in red looking belly serious in the meeting. very blur i know. camera no good is lidat.

below are clearer shots of him and our division from the one year count down. chris secretly kept them till today. haha.

the most loving couple in SPV. check out how happy they look, esp jason. HAHA! oh and i think my face here is damn awesome chio. woo! HAHAHAHA!

here's my boss with his favourite intern. haha! i swear this is what i go by in the office. SIGH! just looking at this photo makes me sad! o hair, where art thou?

ellann & cat.

omg kym! your one second of fame! haha!

SPV at chris's wedding. =) i see my long hair again. T.T


moving along! celebrated huixin's and shangyi's birthday with the girls on sunday night at heeren's shokudo!


happy birthday! =D

I have no idea when did i become the designated gift giver every year. T.T




hui xin.

shang yi.

seow ling. she looks so much like her brother here, it's scary. ha.

susanna shee shi min. so happy. haha.


my girls. =) and why do i still manage to look fat here?! sigh! tu lan.


anyway, I WANNA GO US! there's this interterm course in chapman orange and basically we'll be going over for 1 month to take a module in the orange campus and it's really interesting! but the whole thing will cost around SGD$3000. but this is not the heavy point! the heavy point is there's this summer in LA programme where we get to spend our summer holiday in LA where we will be interning in film companies for 3 whole months! SO COOL RIGHT?! cb the whole thing will cost around SGD$10,000 AT LEAST lo. best. SIGH! o money, where art thou?


random photos time!

SERIOUSLY. the person who bought these flowers and thought of arranging them like that ought to be shot. a million times and over. totally wtf. worst i've ever seen. the flowers aren't even really flowers. woo!

this black cat was just lying on its back like some lazy pig when sl send me home on sunday! and yes, it's just a huge mass of black. haha. so irritating yet so cute at the same time! ha!


below are case studies of retardedness:

1. kelda chai mei zi


HAHA! so vulgar this person. tsk tsk tsk.




OH HO HO!

2. kenneth hu jia jian






ning summor lo ning. haha! don't think your chinese ai zai then can lidat k? haha! and 都几岁的人了 still refuse to change that irritating nickname of his. summor still action action got bracket plus big letter small letter know! best! haha! anyway, can any of you honestly tell me you heard of this phrase before?! it's like damn super chim la! still hai me go and google this phrase just to find out that it just means the person is sleepy. WHERE THE FUCK IS THE LINK WITH SLEEPING AND FINDING THIS RETARDED ZHOU PERSON FOR CHESS YOU SAY YOU SAY?! tskkkkkk! tu lan. ha.

3. kym lee yi yuin






HAHAHA! stupid retarded cheena pok you. NAH. YOUR FEW SECONDS OF FAME. WHOLE convo copy and paste k! summor got your photo in front know! see! i treat you good not? hahaha!


okay, i shall now leave you all with my super awesome chio photo. MUAHAHAHA!


kthnxbai.

danced on the moon at 7:57 pm.

double reversal.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009

i have 2 mid term papers tmr and i haven even read finish one module yet! look at the time! woo! gg. i can't seem to concentrate. RAHHHHH!

oh but on the up side, tmr is training venue AOP! like finally! YAY! =D i am SOOOOOO excited for them! hurhurhur! oh and yesterday was ellann's birthday! i need to go back to surprise him! hurhur! I WANNA GO BACK TMR! =DDDDD

okay enough side tracking. FOCUS LYN! FOCUS!

danced on the moon at 9:20 pm.

cut, cut, cut.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009

mid terms are here. fuck this. i don't even have time to study. weeee!!!!!!

danced on the moon at 10:26 pm.

crude but good.
Saturday, October 24, 2009

after feeling emo and watching grey's and pp to make myself feel more emo and therefore crying the shit out of myself to make myself feel better, a retarded friend came along and made me feel much better by telling me this:



fyi, he was harping on this video all night AND, he ALWAYS does his facial before he sleeps. but the night cream? respect. HAHA. even i don't do so much nonsense to my face.

then this irritating person randomly showed me a series of rodney carrington's video for no reason which totally made me laugh like mad and in turn made my day better again. i am emo no more. haha! thanks gucci!

one of his stand up comedies. like i said, he's crude but he's good. ha.

danced on the moon at 3:12 am.

cause the power always lies with the one who cares less.

and it's so true isn't it? in any kind of relationship, be it with parents, friends or lovers, the one who cares less is always the one with more power. maybe it's a gender thing. maybe it's fated that the girl always has to care more than the guy. so in the end the girl is always the one getting hurt and not the other way around. yeap. that must be it.

i think i treasure you too much as a friend which is why i care too much which, in turn translate to you as annoying and naggy. and you just feel like shutting me up. i really hope that i can say the same about you but somehow i just can't. i really wish i can. i wish you were as annoying and straight forward as yi song is to me. what he say, i might not like to hear and may not want to hear it too, but at least that way i know he really cares about me and is really listening to me. the truth may hurt but at least i know he cares. but you? yes, i am your friend. you say it, but you just don't show it.

the reason why i'm even telling you all those stuff is because i'm your friend and i actually care about you and i just really want you to make the right choice but ultimately it's really up to you. i can't force you to do anything you don't like. i like to think that i am empathetic. hell, i know i am. i always think about your feelings first and so i'll keep my emotions in check and phrase my sentences properly so that i'll cause the least amount of damage to your feelings. but can you honestly say you've done the same for me? i trust you and so i tell you stuff. emotional stuff. and you throw it right back in my face. i can't even start to describe how it makes me feel. i can safely tell you now that throughout our whole conversation tonight and even before tonight, you've hurt me even more times than my boyfriend has in the past year. even my boyfriend doesn't treat me like that, what gives you the right to?

and please stop using the excuse of you being slow and me being complicated. granted i'll give you leeway once or twice but after so many times of reminders? if you even care about me and your friendship at all, you'd at least put in the effort to try and understand. you know you didn't even say sorry at all? not even once throughout our whole conversation? all you did was just to find fault and blame me. honestly, i don't know if you could tell if i'm hurt at all which i highly doubt that you did because unfortunately i know you too well. and you probably still think that i'm just being a bitch and being complicated and everything. and i like to tell you it's fine? but honestly? it's not fine. it's not fine at all. i'm hurt and it's not fine. i know i'm a guy to you and yes i can usually take whatever you throw at me, but this time, i need to draw the line. i need to remind you that i am in fact just a girl. i do have girly emotions and feelings too. i actually do feel and have tears too. just because i don't show it in front of you doesn't mean i don't. and therefore, no, i am not fine.

i'd bet you won't even know about any of this because you hate reading blogs. so good for you. you'll never know how i truly feel. even khien reads my blog occasionally. khien. yes khien, you didn't read wrong. and he isn't even that close a friend to me either. so what excuse do you have? you just couldn't care less could you? but then again, how can i blame you? i'm just a friend. a replaceable friend that i am sure you can find in a week. so i guess, it must be me again. i must be being complicated and girly again.

i know you must hate me right now and wish you'd never known me at all then at least you won't need to take all these shit, believe me, i wish the same thing too. because then i won't be so upset right now and i know i'm going to regret all that i say here tonight if by some miracle you actually read this. if you really read this, i would have definitely hurt your feelings too and that is the last thing i want. believe me, i actually hate myself for saying all these and i don't wish for our friendship to change or feel awkward after this. i still see you as my close friend. but will you still treat me the same after tonight? after you read this? all i want is for you to understand and i'm really sorry if i hurt you. but the question now is, are you?

i'm just glad that my baby will be out tomorrow and all these bad feelings will eventually all go away. =)

danced on the moon at 12:16 am.

no good end.
Thursday, October 22, 2009

i should learn how to control my temper next time. i was SOOO angry and so angsty just now with all the fucking poly kids and some people, i decided to go do something drastic and go cut my hair.

WRONG MOVE.

now my hair is fuck short, i have never seen it THIS short, not since LOWER PRIMARY. fuck. i dyed it red too and it still looks black. ccb. i look like a fucking fucktard now. i hate school. i don't want to go to school anymore! JUST KILL ME NOW!

danced on the moon at 9:38 pm.

why me?! whyyyy?!

is it me or is the rest of the class just hardworking? i'm trying my best to listen to whatever jordi is saying now but I JUST CAN'T! his voice just makes me feel sleepy and it doesn't help that the room is so cold! and my tummy hurts cause of fucking al ameen but i just can't get it out. =( this whole situation is making me emo again! RAHHHHHH!

WHY THE FUCK IS THE WHOLE CLASS LISTENING TO EVERY WORD JORDI SAYS LIKE THEY'RE LISTENING TO IT FOR THE FIRST TIME?! HE WENT THROUGH THE FUCKING SLIDES BEFORE AND HE'S SAYING EXACTLY THE SAME THING! MY GOD! WHY DO THEY ACT LIKE THAT?! this whole fucking situation is so hypocritical it's making me angry. gosh.

and seriously, it's not like he's going through fucking rocket science. it's just fucking common sense. if you don't get it the first time he said it, what makes you think you'll get it the second time? GOD! and you know the funny thing is those people that actually really listen and pay attention, ALWAYS get the WRONG fucking answer! GOD! what's all that listening for if you fucking don't get it! even people like me who don't give a fuck knows the answer with COMMON SENSE! MY GOD! some people just deserve to be slapped.

okay i think i should stop ranting now. the more i rant, the more angsty and emo i get. gosh. it must be the fucking period. zzz.

danced on the moon at 3:40 pm.

take everything that i know you'll break.

okay my title has nothing to do with my content. it's just random. like my content. HAHA!


this is what a bunch of irritating people do at the wee hours of the night. notice my bf at the back? HAHAHA!

kym sent this to me and she named this file McTurkey. HAHAHAHA!

bling right?! sibeh look like tai tai sia. together with my hideous hooker nails.

i owned babi eng in baseball! 5-1 okay?! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!

i just don't undersatnd some women some times. for god's sake the sanitary bin is RIGHT BESIDE the toilet! at least have the decency to throw your fucking tampon cover INTO the bin? the worse part is the wrapper is plastic lo! whoever did this 缺德 thing, i hope your vagina rots. seriously.

just wanted to show you all my awesome chio socks from daiso. $2 only! and it's chio with pink! =D

check out my newly bought USB drive. hurhur. it is chio and i rikes it.


awesome. the diao sock reminds me of ziggy. T.T

HAHAHAHA! most awesome bio EXAM answer ever!


screenshot of convos of my retarded friends:

1. billy

retarded. haha!





ha. fyi, billy is in america and it is impossible for me to ask him out. i just like to ask people stuff like that for fun. haha!

2. kym



irritating girl! oh btw, i'm secretly lesbian and kym is my girlfriend. haha!

retarded!


haha! this girl like to sabo me!

danced on the moon at 10:24 am.